Tag Archives: Relationships

Choose a new empowering perspective

Choose a new empowering perspective

Many of our members have found themselves unexpectedly single.  Perhaps, like me, they lost someone through illness. Or their relationship ended because they grew apart. In any of these situations, there is a period of grief.

The end of any relationship means the end of a whole phase of your life. The end of shared happiness, fears and plans for the future. Every relationship has its own story and every ending is hard in its own way.

This week, I am going to focus on my perspective about the loss of my relationship. I am going to ask myself this question, “Does my perspective serve me and who I am becoming?”

In my case, it is very reasonable to feel disbelief, sadness and anger. But does that empower me to become more peaceful and accepting? I can be sad and angry about the sudden loss of Reg. I can ask why and what if, but will that help me create acceptance and a peaceful mindset?

So, I’m going to as myself, “How can I see this differently?

I was lucky to have such a wonderful relationship. We had a lot of good times. He taught me a lot about what is really important in relationships.

The important thing is not to come up with a rose-coloured glasses interpretation that feels too unrealistic. A new perspective that feels empowering will help you move forward to how you would like your life to be.

If you had a  relationship break up and you didn’t want to, it can be a bitter pill to swallow. You wonder how they could so easily turn their back on you and all that you shared. Getting stuck in  the “how could they? ” and the “they didn’t realise what they had” will stop you from seeing the big picture.

Change your thinking from “If only we had done this differently” to “What can I learn from this and take with me into a future relationship?”

Maybe you stopped getting to know each other and spending special time together. Maybe you both forgot to prioritise each other and to being a team. There will be a lesson in the ending of the relationship that you can apply in your life and future relationships.

I know I won’t achieve that mindset all of the time. If I can change my perspective even for  a little while, I know I am headed in the right direction.

“It’s not only moving that creates new starting points. Sometimes all it takes is a subtle shift in perspective, an opening of the mind, an intentional pause and reset, or a new route to start to see new options and new possibilities.” — Kristin Armstrong

I hope you can adopt an empowering mindset about relationships this week.

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

A Table for Six

 

What The Foxtel Guy Could Teach Us

What The Foxtel Guy Could Teach Us

 A random stranger can bring hope and a little ray of sunshine in sad times.
Friends and family have been visiting and checking on me since Reg’s passing. And in recent weeks, I needed to update some of my Foxtel equipment. One morning, Trev, The Foxtel Guy was updating and installing new equipment at the same time a friend was visiting.

Trev obviously overheard some conversation and when my friend left he asked if there was anything he could do to help. As we do, I assumed he was just being polite. After thanking him, I said  replied “no” and he left.

To my surprise, later that day, Trev was at my door with a cheerful smile and a small but very pretty bunch of flowers. He handed me the flowers and a card, saying “I just wanted to show you that a random act of kindness from a stranger can brighten you day. Everything will be alright.”

Trev could teach us about giving and receiving. The same qualities that stop us from happily giving, are the same ones that make us uncomfortable about receiving. Often it is our insecurities, lack of self esteem and self love that hold us back. If we don’t love ourselves, then we don’t trust why someone would be kind to us.

Since I have shared this with my family and friends, Trev’s story has touched everybody. He certainly made a difference to me and I’m sure he will be repaid in some form.

Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end. — Scott Adams

Contact us at A Table for Six to take a step in the right direction to meet other singles looking for genuine friendships and genuine relationships.

Checkout our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

A Table for Six

 

Want a different dating result? Change your thoughts

Want a different dating result? Change your thoughts

Are you are holding on to negative beliefs about finding new friends, meeting a suitable partner and dating? Your mind is very powerful. The stories you tell yourself can either hold you back and prevent positive change in your life or they can allow new wonderful people to come into your life and new relationships to blossom. Even the most optimistic of us can be guilty of this at times.

Want a different dating result? Change your thoughts

Want a different dating result? Change your thoughts

It’s always interesting when speaking to new potential members. Many have reached a point where they know they need to be proactive and are ready and open to what (and whom) will come into their lives and where it may take them.

Others have created problems and scenarios in their own mind before they have even stepped out the door for their first dinner. YOUR beliefs can either help or hurt you!
For example,  “I’m not good at meeting new people. ” or “I will never meet anyone as lovely as my late husband/wife.”

Limiting thoughts and beliefs create the same problems that repeat themselves in different relationships. Habitual negative thoughts run on autopilot,  and if you believe them, you can’t change your life and solve the same problems that can keep arising in different relationships and situations.

Your thoughts determine your feelings, and your behaviours and actions are determined by your thoughts. With negative thoughts running unchecked in your mind, it’s difficult to feel good about yourself. When your behaviour and actions come from feeling bad about yourself, you won’t get good results.

In order to achieve a different result, stop and check those negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones that are just as true or even more true.
An example would be, if you believe there are no good men/women out there, you’ll continue attracting men/women who are not good for you. When you stop this negative thought and replace it with one that serves you,  you’ll open up the possibility to attract  a wealth of new friends and even a partner to share your life.

Start meeting new people and expect to have an enjoyable time, meeting interesting people and don’t quit on yourself.
If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree.” ~Ji Rohn

Replace your thoughts with positive ones this week

Checkout our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

A Table for Six

Are you too busy to prioritise your dating life?

Are you too busy to prioritise your dating life?

Each day is a new opportunity. I chose to make this day a great one.

Wise words from the inspirational Louise Hay. I’m always interested to hear the excuses that people use for not taking positive action to live their life at their highest level.

Are you too busy to prioritise your dating life?

Are you too busy to prioritise your dating life?

If you’re happy in your life and fulfilled in all areas, then you are living your best life. But if you are “too busy” then that is a choice you have made.
All the activities you engage in, are the result of your choices. You’ve copped out on living your life on purpose. Difficult family relationships, lots of small details that only you can take care of, a way too busy work schedule are eating away at your life and stealing your opportunity every day to live a life where you are fulfilling your destiny.

Take a little time to think about how you would really prioritise your life. Think about saying “no” sometimes – it’s allowed. You and your house/car/appearance/ don’t have to be perfect all the time. And who decided what is perfect anyway? Practise asking for help, delegating and taking time for yourself.

Fear is often what is holding us back from really living a life where we feel fulfilled. If you would like to look fear in the eye and see what’s really possible for you, decide today that you intend to take time for yourself to live the life that you came here to live, and to do it without ignoring your responsibilities are a parent, spouse or employee.

When you join, I take a lot of information about you, including your age group, occupation, how you like to spend your spare time and more. For our members, we co-ordinate the dinner group for you each time you attend a dinner. We ensure you will have some new people to meet, with members around your own age. Our goal is to put you with a group you will relate to, feel comfortable with, and people you can enjoy some laughs around the table. That has been a proven successful formula.

Contact us at A Table for Six to take a step in the right direction to meet other singles looking for genuine friendships and genuine relationships.

Checkout our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

A Table for Six

Dating worries?…not if you follow this simple plan

Dating worries?…not if you follow this simple plan

You are setting out of your house on an evening out. Are you excited and looking forward to having some fun and connecting with new interesting people?

Or, does the little voice in your head sabotage you before you even arrive by whispering that you won’t meet anyone you like?

Are you prioritising your dating life?

Dating worries?…not if you follow this simple plan

If:
you set your intention before you arrive at your destination,
you decide that you are looking forward to meeting people with interesting stories to tell,
you see yourself having a great time,
you are setting yourself up to succeed. You will be laying the groundwork for making new friends, dating and even falling in love to happen.

Expecting that the man or woman of your dreams will be there with outstretched arms waiting for you? You are setting yourself up to be disappointed and also missing out on a real gem.

We have all been guilty of judging. It’s a natural human trait. But it is self sabotaging behaviour. You meet some new people and make a judgement about them because of their hairstyle or the colour of their shoes. This moment of judgement could stop you from getting to know them and you could be missing out on a wonderful friendship.

Judging others is really only hurting ourselves. It’s no reflection on the other person.
“When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself. ” ~ Wayne Dyer

Do you notice negative things? Be committed to looking for opportunities that bring you pleasure. The delicious food, a spectacular view or the person you just met who gave you a tip about real estate. Notice the lovely smile on the person with the purple shoes.

And that person with the very different hairstyle, could be the most interesting person in the room. (There’s only a week between a bad and a good haircut)

Be committed to looking for opportunities this week

Check out our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.auA Table for Six
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

Millions of people have happy relationships- why shouldn’t you?

Millions of people have happy relationships- why shouldn’t you?

If you have been single for a while, perhaps you have registered on an online dating site.

Or maybe you have been out with your girlfriends or mates hoping to meet someone. You got excited at first when you received a lot of messages on the online site. You even met a few people for coffee or a drink. But they weren’t anything like you were expecting them to be. Or you may have dated a couple of them for a while.

Millions of people have happy relationships- why shouldn’t you?

Millions of people have happy relationships- why shouldn’t you?

But after knowing them for a time, you found that the information they had given wasn’t exactly true. They said they were financially stable, but then you found out they had nothing but debts. They said they were ready for a real relationship, but they actually were still living with their ex.

So you decided:

Dating means disappointment
Dating means hurt
Dating is hard work

So you decide to take a well deserved break from dating.

You fill up your life with friends, family, work and travel. – another two years pass by.

You notice your friends are finding their special partner so you decide to dip your toe in the water of dating again.

But your previous experience tells you that relationships cause pain.

Don’t build your conclusions on a narrow field of experience. Millions of people have happy relationships. And if some people can be blissfully happy, why shouldn’t you be?

It’s true that dating involves some luck, timing, chemistry, similar goals and values. But people fall in love everyday. So if it hasn’t happened to you yet, it means that you need to meet more people.

If you were job hunting, you wouldn’t stop applying for positions because you hadn’t found the right position.

Our dinners will give you the opportunity to meet other singles in person in a relaxed, friendly environment. It’s time to step out, act confident and know you won’t fail.

Check out our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.auA Table for Six
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

Like to catch up? It’s a big ask

Like to catch up? It’s a big ask

Have you ever been asked out for a meal or a drink and found yourself having a dialogue in your head about what could happen if you say yes? Would they fit in with my friends? Will they really “get” me? Would they make a good mother/father?

Oops, I think we’re a bit ahead of ourselves here. We are almost asking them to validate our very existence. Like to catch up? It’s a big ask

Sometimes it’s all tied up in other things. What most of us haven’t learned is not to make it mean anymore than it is.

It’s fun when you keep it simple. Life is a contact sport. If you are asked to catch-up with someone again, say yes to a drink or a quick meeting.

Here’s a quote I read this week-“If you think a person is boring, you don’t know them well enough.”

have fun this week…

Check out our upcoming dinners here

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.auA Table for Six
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

Attract the Perfect Partner for YOU!

Attract The Perfect Partner For YOU!

Some people believe that to find a perfect partner, they need to find someone who shares the same interests, hobbies, falls within a certain age group or looks a certain way.

Of course, nobody is perfect. Everyone has some flaws or baggage if they have lived a life. But to find someone who has the right attitude with a few flaws is more realistic. For a relationship to survive in the medium to long term, it is more important to share most of the same values.

Attract The Perfect Partner For YOU!

Attract The Perfect Partner For YOU!

When our members join A Table for Six, we do take information on these interests and also their values. Some people have spent more time on deciding what is important in a car than their relationship. So take some time to list your top ten values . Then when you meet someone, you have a gauge to go by. Don’t expect them to be 10’s on every single item on your list, at least a 6 and preferable an 8 or 9.

Some of the more common core values in a perfect partner might be;

**Family is very important.
**Maintaining a healthy work/life balance is important.
**Honesty is of utmost importance and trust must be earned.
**They believe, or don’t believe in God or have an affiliation with a religious institution.
**Maintaining a healthy body.
**A belief in being responsible in handling finances.

These are also values you might list as important to you;

Loving, nurturing, fit, inspiring, positive, motivated, fun-loving humorous, creative, honest, consistent, open-minded, committed, loyal, dependable, adventurous, passionate, respectful, athletic, educated, respected.

To really know if someone you meet has these values may take time. It is very well if they say they have them, but  a core value is only a core value if the person lives by them, at least most of the time.

So what do you want? It’s good to have high standards, but who do you need to become to attract the person with these qualities you have listed? Is it time to look within yourself and ask if you are someone a person with these values would be attracted to? This is the real question and where the biggest opportunity of change lies! It can also be hardest.
Are you ready for a new relationship?

Read Our Recent Reviews Here
Start putting a plan together for your life this week.

Complete the enquiry form to put us to work on your dating life

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.auA Table for Six
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

To risk, to find love

To risk, to find love
Do you believe you are a risk taker?
Below is a beautiful poem I  read again this week. I keep a copy of it and look at it often. It always reminds me listen to myself. To connect with the part of me that is trying very hard to get out, but fear of embarrassment, failure or rejection is holding back. To listen to my inner voice that is telling me to be, or do something more.
All of us have a part that is begging to get out. We have a message to share, a unique skill or talent that isn’t being shared with the world. They are not being expressed because we have chosen a less risky pursuit and so they are lying dormant.
Letting this part of you shine through will guide you towards good risk.

To risk, to find love

To risk, to find love

Is it time to risk, to find love?
 Take some good risk in the area of your social or dating life. Contact us now to connect with other singles for fun, relaxed dinners and lasting genuine relationships.
“To Risk”
by William Arthur Ward
To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or live.
Chained by his servitude he is a slave who has forfeited all freedom.

Only a person who risks is free.
The pessimist complains about the wind;
The optimist expects it to change;
And the realist adjusts the sails.

Checkout our upcoming dinner introductions here
Take some good risk this week for your dating life.

Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.auA Table for Six
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311

Are you prioritising your dating life?

Are you prioritising your dating life?

What is the most important area of your life? Is your love life as important as watching your favourite show on TV or your 40-50 hour a week job? Sometimes I think it must not be. I know you’re busy and have your priorities.

Are you prioritising your Dating Life?

Are you prioritising your Dating Life?

If you were at the end of your life and looking back, would you wish you had worked more hours or would you regret not making your personal life a priority?

Any goal you set for yourself has a formula for success. Failure is never that you don’t know how to achieve the goal. It’s that you won’t take the necessary steps to make it happen.

Dating isn’t that intricate or difficult. There’s a basic formula that will lead to meeting a loving partner.

1. Choose an avenue for meeting suitable singles (find something you enjoy along the way)
2.  Ask as many questions as possible about how other singles have achieved dating success through the service.
3. Ask for  advice from the singles organisation or study up on the best dating tips and behaviour.
4. Spend some time and a little money on making the most of your appearance. (Everyone has attractive qualities. It’s a matter of drawing attention to them)
5. Know what your boundaries are that are non-negotiable.
6. Outside of your non-negotiables, be open to whom you date.
7. Be open to catching up with a potential partner a 2nd (or 3rd) time.
8. Date your potential partners and give them a real chance (Don’t dismiss them without seeing the possible gem)
9. Continue dating until you find someone who’s worthy of your love and life.
That’s it!
If you’re ready for this approach to meeting singles and finding one of the good gals/guys, click on the link to our Membership Enquiry Form and I will call you to talk about how we can help you.

“Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.”
~ David Grayson

Get my weekly blog here

A Table for Six
Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311