Single and Stuck in a Rut? Add More Joy!

By Dee, 23 July, 2024.

Are you single and feeling stuck in a rut?  We get that.  Winter can make it hard to find your spark! 

A new book by Tali Sharot, “Look Again”, shares ways we can find more joy in life. 

Sharot identifies a key issue called ‘habituation’, which is the process by which we become used to our surroundings and experiences. This can lead to a diminishing sense of joy over time.  

To boost joy and happiness in our daily lives, Sharot suggests simple ways to combat habituation. 

Here are six key tips she shares:

1. Take a Break – Small or Big!

One of the simplest ways to combat habituation is to take regular breaks. Whether it's a short pause during a hectic workday or a longer holiday, breaks can refresh our perspective and renew our appreciation for the things we often take for granted. Sharot emphasises that even small breaks, like a five-minute walk outside or a quick coffee break, can have a significant impact on our mental well-being. These pauses interrupt the routine and provide a moment to reset, making us more likely to notice and enjoy our surroundings.

2. Add Variety

Spice up your life by adding some variety! Introducing variety into our lives can reduce the effects of habituation. Sharot suggests mixing things up, whether it’s trying a new hobby, exploring different cuisines, or altering our daily routines. Variety stimulates our brains, keeping us engaged and curious. By continually exposing ourselves to new experiences, we can gain more interest and enjoyment. This doesn’t require big changes; even small shifts, like taking a different route to work or experimenting with a new recipe, can make a big difference.

3. Change the Scenery

Sometimes, a change of scenery is all it takes to spark our sense of joy. Sharot explains that our environment plays a crucial role in how we feel. A new setting can provide a fresh perspective and help break the monotony of familiar surroundings. This can be as simple as redecorating a room, spending time in nature, or visiting a new place in your city. Changing the scenery helps us to notice details we might have overlooked before and refreshes our minds.

4. When in Doubt – Err on the Side of More Change

When in doubt, try more change, rather than less. Change can be challenging, but it's also a great way to combat habituation.  Embracing change, even in small ways, keeps life dynamic and exciting. This doesn’t mean making reckless decisions but rather being open to new opportunities and willing to step out of our comfort zones. Whether it’s a career shift, a new relationship, or trying a different sport, more change can lead to greater fulfilment and joy. 

5. Allow Time to Adjust to Change

Give yourself time to adjust to change. While variety and change are good, it’s important to give ourselves the time and grace to adapt. Major changes can be overwhelming, and it’s natural to experience a period of adjustment. By being patient with ourselves during these transitions, we can begin to appreciate the new experiences. This balance between embracing change and allowing time for adjustment ensures that we don’t become overwhelmed. Then we can genuinely enjoy the benefits of a more varied and dynamic life. 

6. Invest in Experiences 

Finally, research says that experiences often spark more long-lasting joy than things. When you buy a new car, outfit, phone, or any other item, you quickly get used to it. However, experiences like concerts or nights out tend to linger in your mind, bringing back high levels of joy each time you recall them. Experiences bring more lasting happiness than material possessions. So enrol in that new class, buy that concert ticket, go out to dinner! 

In summary, incorporating these tips into our daily lives can help us rediscover the joy in our surroundings and experiences. By investing in experiences, taking breaks, adding variety, changing our scenery, embracing more change, and allowing time to adjust, we can find more joy and happiness.

Many of these tips are relevant to singles who are thinking about getting out of a rut and finding new and better dating opportunities, off the apps. New experiences can include speed dating and dinner dating.  Trying a singles dating event can help bring variety to your life, while increasing new ways of meeting others.  Dinner dating is all about stepping out of your comfort zone and embracing change. 

Join us today at A Table For Six to try new experiences and find more joy in your life!  

Photo: Elena de Soto on Unsplash.