Have you ever reached out to someone youâd like to catch up with again, or someone you admire and would love to get to know? You called and left a phone message or sent off a text or email. You checked for a responseâŠ.and waitedâŠand waited, but nothing.
Who do they think they are? You start to think that they donât think you are insertâŠ. cool/ good looking/ slim/wealthy/ importantâŠenough. You go into all of those insecurities that are hiding just beneath the surface ready to emerge. Soon your thoughts replay in your mind the story that âWell who do they think they are anyway?â If they donât want to be in touch with me, I certainly donât want anything to do with them!
Hold that thought. Don Miguel in his book âThe Four Agreementsâ his second agreement says, âDonât take anything personally â Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you wonât be the victim of needless suffering.â
Donât take anything personally. Don Miguel tells us not to take anything personally. Not criticism, not rejection, not even praise. âTaking things personally is the maximum expression of selfishness. It makes the assumption everything is about me.â
They have busy lives too. In our busy lives many of us are drowning in email, overloaded at work, and struggling to keep up at home. Just maybe, your message was overlooked by mistake. Or, it may not have reached them.
Have you been guilty of this too? You probably have overlooked responding to someone yourself. In my own life, one of my girlfriends left a phone message last week, and I havenât had a chance to call her back yet. It doesnât mean that I no longer value her friendship or care about her. Itâs just that time hasnât allowed that call yet. So, Iâd better make sure I call her later today.
Reach out again. Youâve got nothing to lose. If there is someone on your mind that you reached out to, but didnât hear back from, why not send another message? Youâve got nothing to lose. If you send a friendly follow up message something like this âI know you are really busy and may have forgotten about my message. So I am just following up with you again.â
Donât make them wrong or feel guilty. Saying that you contacted them and hadnât heard back and that you are upset wonât produce the desired outcome.
So try reaching out to someone you have tried to contact one more time. You might be delighted with the response.
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Margaret Newitt
www.atableforsix.com.au
info@atableforsix.com.au
1300 885 311